You should have read them correctly and interpreted their ‘no’ as a ‘yes’. 15) So if you’re not going to tell people about your autism, the only way not to be seen as awkward or having poor interpersonal skills is to pretend to be like everyone else. (Seriously, on my first ever date the girl wanted me to pay for her lunch, so instead of just asking me honestly she hinted that she didn’t have enough money for food and for the bus.
They’re not actually your fault, but they are definitely Your Fault. 14) The correct category for me is ‘Asperger’s Syndrome’ rather than ‘mild autism’.
7) If you don’t notice that a girl is interested in you, it’s Your Fault. 8) If someone drops an extremely subtle hint and it goes over your head, it’s Your Fault. 9) If you ask people whether they want the last potato and everyone says ‘no, that’s fine’, it’s Your Fault if you take it. 11) 70% of people on the autism spectrum have something else as well (ADHD, dyslexia, dyspraxia, for example). 12) Some people with autism are the nicest, most kind-hearted people you’ll ever meet. But it’s difficult telling people you have Asperger’s because it ends with the word ‘syndrome’. I don’t like using the phrase ‘social learning disorder’ either, because it ends with the word ‘disorder’.
So I’ve spent my life teaching myself the rules for what to do in each social situation. Surround yourself with people who can effectively guide you through rules. And me, the aspiring professional beach volleyball player. He was on the phones, picking up orders, and I'd stand in the British Pound pit, flashing hand signals to him to tell him what was bid and offer. He would not go down on me, so I started writing obsessively about his not going down on me. But then he saw that I don't know left and right, really, and my math skills end, largely, at third grade, and I am an idiot savant when it comes to memorizing statistics about Gen Y tendencies at work. And he has learned that the only way to get me uncurled is to talk to me. He says what he's doing with his hands, what he is feeling, what we will do, what I have done, he tries to stick to facts. And he does not expect me to move or speak, until I've heard enough verbal cues to get back in the game.
I study people, make notes for myself, and then test the notes to see what other situations my notes apply to. I tried, and then we both agreed that I couldn't. She spent the whole evening talking about how smart I am and how many books I've read and how strong I am. He'd flash back a hand signal like, buy ten at twenty. To get rid of him, I told him I was a lesbian and I only wanted to date him if there could be another woman there, too. Notice how there's one theme here: I have no idea how other people think about sex. Do not get obsessively sidetracked by things that do not require social interaction. Like the time he told me he couldn't do it because he had a toothache. Just tell me you want to have sex.” So a day went by, and he did that. Sometimes, when the farmer was dumping me, and people were saying, how can you stick with him?
Many of these tests are based on research that might not be that well grounded in science.
Broadly speaking, they probably do give a good idea of whether or not to pursue an assessment, but don’t let them become a source of anxiety either way.
On April 2nd this year, World Autism Awareness Day, I decided to offer a little insight to some of my Facebook friends. We’re 1% of the general population, which is higher than it sounds.
Their responses were actually what inspired me to start Autistic Not Weird in the first place (and its Facebook page, which opens in a new window). If you are on the spectrum, may I ask how many of these apply to you? I’d be curious to know how much us guys truly have in common! 3) Autistic people aren’t always similar to one another, for exactly the same reason that non-autistic people aren’t either. Personally I’ve spent less than two years of my life being one of the 19%.
~ Chris & Carmen S." If you have tried talking, screaming, punishing, pleading, and negotiating -- but your teen still walks all over you…